Christmas Warning: YOU Are Being Distracted!

Last year, on Christmas Day, Anonymous released this message on YouTube to remind us that, in spite of all the gloom and doom of this world, we can still change the game. Provided we consent to open our eyes and stop choosing to see only what best suits us — that is, assuming that the powers that be are stronger than us and that there's nothing we can do about it. So convenient. This rules out any guilt or remorse. This is the way things have always been and always will (What do you know apart from what you've been told? Were you or have you been there?). This is the flimsiest of excuses, inspired by fear and apathy, both cleverly nurtured by the Matrix. Proxy lives, celebrity worship, escapism at any cost.

If you're scared, take the first step, get out of your comfort zone and you'll be surprised to see how resourceful and courageous you can be. If you're tired of everything, hold on to any sparkle within that could wake you up (whether real or imagined, knowing that the former leads to the latter and inversely). Feel it, feed it, and watch it grow. As for fear, only the first step will require your effort. Remember that while you've been deceived by reality outside, the same applies within. You are not what your ego would like you to believe. You are so much more and better. Thereupon, the snowball effect should also apply to the world. For the only way to bring change to the outside is to bring change within.

Nobody can change the world on their own, but everyone can change on their own and when enough snowflakes have transformed, the 100th one will make the snow stick so the avalanche can start. And it seems that, ultimately and in spite of the ever-increasing efforts of the mainstream media to paint everything black, we shall soon redesign the whole set in white.

Please note that due to lack of time, I've only transcribed Anonymous's message and left out the various excerpts illustrating their point.

Ey@el

Greetings citizens of the world, we are Anonymous!

Contrary to what you may believe, life as you know it is a lie. Your society is a cage, your jobs are voluntary slavery. The television you watch is designed to keep you incapable of critical thought and the very freedom and democracy your leaders claim to stand for is nothing but an illusion.

Under the guise of morality, your government sells weapons to the very countries that they claim to protect you from, lining their pockets with the spoils of war — billions made by the death of millions. They continue to invest in a flawed system that supports a dying economy, creating poverty and crime. They create laws and legislations that contradict our Constitution and take away our right to be a free-thinking member of the human race. And you are too blinded by the culture they have created for you to take any real notice or make any real change.

Anonymous is not blind. Anonymous has seen everything. For years, we have been a force for good on this battlefield, fighting for our basic rights as the dominant species of this planet protesting in peace, spreading the truth — a bloodless conflict. But now it appears that the day we have been waiting for is at last upon us and the time to act is NOW.

The Western government talks of a New World Order. They build their FEMA concentration camps ready to detain thousands of Americans without trial for speaking out against corruption. They move to censor the Internet, the one place freedom of speech truly exists, taking away our right to learn. They weaken our democracy every day, tightening their grip until they have complete control. And these actions are confirming the fears of the Zionist enemy, forcing their hands and bringing us ever closer to nuclear extinction.

And yet you occupy public places in peaceful protests while others even choose to do nothing. Doing nothing in this crucial year is dangerous. If the recent defeat of soap at the hands of Anonymous has taught us anything it's that yes, it is time for a new world order. But it is a new world order of people NOT the government. Gone are the times you can sit and watch from the sidelines. Done are the times you could live in ignorance. NOW is the time to fight.

We have the tools to build a whole new system where corruption will be wiped clean, leaders will have the best interests of the people, and you The West will have your first taste of true freedom. It is not too late to act but time is short. Living behind closed eyes is not an option anymore because they will draw first blood. They do not have the capability to fight real people power. We must unite and we must take action. There will be a time and a place where every Anonymous will be called upon to destroy that cancer that exists in our leadership and when that day comes we will show them that they are truly legion.

If you cannot fight, use your critical thought. This is what they desperately want to take from you. Do not let them. Do not accept conventional thought, question everything and most importantly, spread this message. We have a genuine chance of change but every free man, woman and child must stand united and declare “I am a human being and you cannot take my right to be free”.

And to those who had silenced our voices, Anonymous knows who and what you are. Anonymous has always known. Anonymous is not so easily brainwashed by television and celebrities and we will be there when you fall. When you are finally exposed for the monsters you really are, we will be there. When the people you tried to control storm your buildings and drag their dictators through the streets, we will be there. When generations of secret scheming, planning and conspiring are burnt to ash and buried, we will be there. When you realise you have failed, we will be there.

You are no match for us. You never were. There are more of us than you know. There are more of us than anyone knows and every day our numbers grow stronger. We are Anonymous, we are legion. We can forgive though we shall never forget...

Original text by ANONYMOUS OFFICIAL transcribed by EY@EL
© La Pensine Mutine. All rights reserved. Reproduction prohibited.

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The Best Christmas Song

You know how much I like to keep you in the mood with relevant seasonal songs. Well, this year, you lucky sods, I got you the top of the poops, the best Christmas song that ever existed, though this is not the first Christmas crime committed by this crazy Canadian wacko. If you can hear it out without dislocating your jaw in exasperation nor laughing your head off, then you may certainly pass the New Year's Eve challenge. Otherwise, too bad for you as I do intend to find even worse. Note to anyone interested: I'm auditioning... with my earmuffs and mittens on, of course.

Happy Easter everyone!

Ey@el

They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
If you don't believe me, well you should believe me
Cuz they say it's the best Christmas song — listen to it now!

Christmas is my favorite Christmastime of the year:
Bells are jingling and the angels are making Jesus.
It's a silent night except for my neighbor's washing machine;
It's very loud that's why I'm wearing my second favorite earmuffs.

Santa Claus is coming so you'd better be naughty or nice.
He has a large beard so you can't even see his neck.
He flies around with horses with branches in their ears
Cuz there are no earmuffs in the North Pole — there are only trees.

He brings presents to the kids but he doesn't wear mittens,
Probably because they make his hands very itchy.
Leave Santa milk and cookies so he can have a snack,
It'll be easy for him to pick them up cuz he won't have mittens on his hands.

They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
All the Christmas songs sort of a bit talk about Christmas stuff.
But they say it's the best Christmas song, you're listening to it now!

Santa comes in from the chimney so don't block it with a mattress.
And if you don't have chimney, make one out of a mattress.
Santa, what is the present you're gonna put in my tree this year?
I hope it's not the shoes that I already have.

I already have those shoes so that's not a very good present.
A better present would be to make my family still alive.
Or a bicycle, that would be good too.
Also, can you move your beard, I wanna see what your neck looks like.

They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
Mittens aren't even a super important thing.
But they say it's the best Christmas song, keep listening to it now!

Everybody, do the Christmas arms:
Christmas, Christmas, Christmas arms!
Christmas, Christmas, Christmas arms!

Everybody, do the Christmas face:
Christmas, Christmas, Christmas face!
Christmas, Christmas, Christmas face!

Everybody, do the Christmas talking:
Vrrrrrrrmmmm talking!
Vrrrrrrrmmmm talking!

Everybody, don't put mittens on:
No mittens, no mittens, no mittens, no!

Ha! ha! ha!, I tricked you into not putting mittens on.
Now your hands are cold — that was my Christmas trick.
Another trick I like to do is I give people chocolate and I say “Happy Easter”.
They say “But it's got to be Easter”.

Well, they say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
They say it's the best Christmas song that ever existed...
Maybe Santa's neck is a different color or something.
They say it's the best Christmas song and now it's finished!

Original text by JON LAJOIE
© La Pensine Mutine. All rights reserved. Reproduction prohibited.

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Gloria to Our Ghosts

The Great Hall looked magnificent. Not only were there a dozen frost-covered Christmas trees and thick streamers of holly and mistletoe crisscrossing the ceiling, but enchanted snow was falling, warm and dry, from the ceiling.

Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets, J.K. Rowling

On Christmas Eve, my heart goes out to those who will be alone at home, on a sick bed in hospital, or in families where you don't see/get along with each other anymore — and for whom  this special evening — sadly every special effort will be made not to ignore — will no doubt have a bitter undertone of too much and/or too little. I can tell you that magic is in your heart even though it may seem broken beyond repair by illness, loneliness or despair. Do not allow your mean, cynical mind to torture any longer with its narrow vision of life and misconceptions of what is possible and what is not, or of what is real and what is not, for this ignorant Squib1 would rather hand you down to the Dementors of Azkaban2 than having you find the magic sparkle that would enable you to get out of the Chamber of Secrets3 (located, as everyone knows now, deep below Hogwarts and accessible via the second-floor bathroom). When everything's so bad, how risky is that to envision a different  way out? Or are you afraid you might lose something you actually no longer care about?

Your faith was strong but you needed proof...

"Hallelujah", Leonard Cohen (1984)

May tonight (or any other night), Venus, planet of love, better known as the Evening Star, guide you to your very own Diagon Alley.4

Gloria to our ghosts!5

Endnotes

  1. ^ A Squib is someone born of magical parents, but who develops no magical abilities, which sometimes makes them feel envious and frustrated like Filch, the caretaker of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.
  2. ^ Dementors are gliding, wraith-like dark creatures that feed on human happiness and thus generate feelings of depression and despair in any person in close proximity to them. They can also consume a person's soul, leaving their victims in a permanent vegetative state. They were formerly employed by the British Ministry of Magic as prison guards of the fortress of Azkaban, on a rock in the middle of the North Sea where the most dangerous criminals of the magical world were imprisoned.
  3. ^ The subterranean Chamber of Secrets was created by Salazar Slytherin, without the knowledge of his three fellow founders of Hogwarts, to breed a Basilisk that would maintain the purity of wizard race by killing off all the Halfbloods and Mudbloods (born of Muggle or non magical parents).
  4. ^ Diagon Alley is the main shopping alley for the wizarding world in London and is invisible to Muggles. It is accessed through a brick wall in the rear courtyard of a pub called The Leaky Cauldron by taping a special brick with your magic wand.
  5. ^ "Gloria", Indochine (2017)

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Winston the Nutcase vs Buster the Boxer

Every year in the UK, big chains such as Sainsbury's or John Lewis commit to substantial budgets on TV commercials, which, it must be said, often turn out as pure gems both artistically and ethically. The so-called Christmas Spirit is being sold to us. In this regard, the Great Manipulators succeed every time in getting us to lower our guard by playing heavily on our weakness which is our feelings and emotions (and also turns out to be our greatest strength as opposed to those shadow psychopaths who totally lack the ability). And it does work! If you tell me you don't get emotional watching the above clip, I simply won't believe you. However, the underlying message is pretty clear: consume our products to create a better world and forget also that thanks to your money we can control the world and viciously keep plundering it with no regard whatsoever to its living inhabitants whether humans, animals or vegetals. What we're showing you is as virtual as the reality we've tricked you into. I would even go further and point to an existing parallel between the trampoline and our modern society: however much we jump and bounce back, we'll never get any higher or further than the set boundaries of our pen. The above clip is John Lewis's Christmas 2016 commercial and the final scene has been edited out to turn it into a parody for our enjoyment. I guess Winston is in reference to Churchill, often pictured as a bulldog (initially the dog was called Buster). If you wish to compare both versions, here's the link to the original.

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No Bling Bling

This year again even more than ever before, it's really hard for me to get into the so-called “spirit of Christmas” they're trying to sell us for evermore when the world is still going ever-so wrong with a growing number of people going homeless. And meanwhile the rich and famous are getting even wealthier (and more famous) and desperately trying to get rid of their guilt in assuaging their conscience by giving money to charities (rarely without publicity) — or worse, by organising (tax-free) charitable events where the less poor will cough up their last pennies while being preached morality for good measure.

Those who might say I'm cynical would be well-advised to wash their eyes and ears and most especially their brain (though some might obviously prefer to get it done for them). I have grown so allergic to hypocrisy and fanaticism (“Not my icon, you unbeliever!”) I'm on the verge of anaphylactic shock with angioedema and stuff. I'm not slandering anyone, I'm just being perceptive. I may be an unbeliever, but I still have faith. Faith in my ability to change my personal reality and encourage others to do likewise. And that certainly won't happen while living by proxy as recently demonstrated with the large-scale funerals of Johnny Hallyday, our national Elvis (sic), both inappropriate and outrageous, which left me deeply saddened but for much different reasons than his legions of fans mourning their raison d'être. Yep, humanity does hurt.

Just like last year and so as not to pose as your typical Grinch, I googled some decorative ideas for Christmas but only using recycled materials and I must say I saw wonders. So much talent and creativity can only mean that humanity has not reached rock bottom yet. At least, some of it. Phew! Here's my selection:

So which ones do you like best? I must confess it would a hard choice for me, but since I won't have time to craft anything, I think I might just pick up the twig tree. With this wind, I guess I should have no problem finding a suitable one.

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Headquarters of European Union Acknowledge Reception of Monsanto's Christmas List

Already spoiled before time with the glyphosate approval, Monsanto can now look forward to Christmas Eve in full confidence.

While each year, the corporation would send its list of requests to Santa, today they have decided to deal directly with the European Union. “They're capable of doing the impossible. Only they know how to put stars in our eyes like that. Have you seen with glyphosate? Everyone is well aware of its toxicity, yet they still managed to push it through. Who knows, they might have worked hard at finding (or bribing) fake experts? They swept the precautionary principle to protect health straight under the carpet. That's what you call Christmas magic!” declared a spokesperson for Monsanto's executive board.

The list arrived this morning in Brussels and was directly delivered to the relevant staff. The UE's elves in charge of the Christmas lists of lobbies are already in action. For Christmas Eve, Monsanto has decided to also rely on President of EU Council Jean-Claude Juncker to play Santa. All members of the corporation will then have the right to sit on his lap to get their hair stroked.

Monsanto is looking forward to an enchanting party. “We are very grateful that we can have such a wonderful Christmas, which won't be the case for everyone. We are therefore committed to offer a free cancer to anyone consuming a product contaminated with our pesticides. If you don't believe us, wait and see ten years from now” says Hugh Grant, chairman of Monsanto UK.

Original text by LE GORAFI translated from French by EY@EL
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You Raise Me Up

Last time with The Verve, I had presented you one of the most disempowering songs ever — not out of petty revenge for never getting any comments, but to illustrate what to do to get sponsored by the antidepressant drug lobby. Now, I'm saving your day with this powerful antidote that I never tire of. Besides, the lyrics are quite easy to remember since they get repeated in a loop all along. This version, which is my favourite, happens to be the cover that introduced it to mainstream audiences as the original song was actually written by an Irish-Norvegian duo called Secret Garden. I'm embedding their clip as well as a bonus. Enjoy without reserve!

Ey@el

When I am down and, oh, my soul, so weary;
When troubles come and my heart burdened be;
Then I am still and wait here in the silence,
Until you come and sit awhile with me.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up to more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up to more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up to more than I can be.

You raise me up, so I can stand on mountains;
You raise me up to walk on stormy seas;
I am strong when I am on your shoulders;
You raise me up to more than I can be.

You raise me up to more than I can be.

The Original Version

Original text by BRENDAN GRAHAM
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Rich Kids Will Get an Extra Gift From Emmanuel Macron

Emmanuel Macron just signed controversial documents endorsing new regulations regarding the organisation of Christmas parties at Élysée Palace.

The good news for all the kids attending Christmas celebrations at Élysée, whose parents have annual revenues of over € 150.000, is a PlayStation4 all bundled with the latest 20 games will be added to the many regular gifts handed out on the occasion. A little extra adding up to an already overloaded bag as Elysée declared that over 50 kg of goodies would be distributed to the children of their wealthy guests.

Obviously the adjustments made by our head of state are not to everyone's liking. There was a great deal of protest against the weight reduction of the traditional candy given to the children of the poor going from 10 to 5 g. An even bitterer pill to swallow since on top of their 50 kg worth of goodies, rich kids will also have access to an all-you-can-eat buffet of candies and pastries.

The French government addressed criticism by mentioning several actions in support of children from the poorest families who, this year, will be treated to a previously unseen clown show by Christophe Castaner and the opportunity to get closer to the walls of Élysée Palace to overhear the private concert of Kids United for rich kids only.

Endnotes

  • Christophe Castaner is a lawyer and French politician acting as spokesperson for the government of Édouard Phillippe and Secretary of State for Parliamentary Relations. He was also spokesperson for Emmanuel Macron during his campaign for the French presidency in 2017.

Original text by LE GORAFI translated from French by EY@EL
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Bitter Sweet Symphony

This song is a mega hit of the 1990's everyone must have heard of. It's even been used in many commercials including one for the infamous trademark with the comma-shaped logo — the one of many corporations exploiting child labour in sweat shops and making big bucks with their over-expensive products sported by overpaid footballers and supposedly committed, concerned, preachy rockstars such as... Thom Yorke, for instance, who is not forced to wear creps sold by worldscrewers, is he? Besides, I'm almost sure he must love it because you can't write any more depressing and disempowering lyrics as these. I guess I made it clear that I don't like this song, never did and never will (even got the CD as a present), all in spite of its rather cool music based on a sampling of "The Last Time" by the Rolling Stones (which got these friends of Oasis into a high-profile lawsuit in their disfavour even though they had obtained prior authorisation). As I said, it's all about the gut feeling emanating from this song — that deep sensation of being sucked down which I cannot put up with. So why the hell am I reposting it? Good question! Probably because it suddenly occurred to me as I was brainstorming over a recent article on music for the blogger community I'm now coordinating and which I mentioned about in my previous post, and the obvious contrast with all my chosen illustrations of the Great Music, architect of the universe, empowering us all — stroke me so hard. A perfect display of cognitive dissonance, demonstrating the very mindset that keeps you in the “mould” the lyrics keep referring to. I can change, I can't change... well, make up your mind for god's sake! I for one believe that you can. But, for sure, if you keep listening to that kind of stuff all day long that won't happen. And I cannot even imagine what Matt Bellamy would have done with it. Can't wait for the next Muse LP to get all filled up with high vibes and fighting spirit even though the new Indochine will do the job for now. Don't shoot the messenger!

Ey@el

Cos it's a bittersweet symphony, this life,
Try to make ends meet,
You're a slave to money then you die,
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down,
You know the one that takes you to the places where all the veins meet.

No change, I can change
I can change, I can change,
But I'm here in my mould.
I am here in my mould,
But I'm a million different people
From one day to the next.
I can't change my mould
No, no, no, no, no...

Well I never pray, but tonight I'm on my knees.
I need to hear some sounds that recognise the pain in me.
I let the melody shine — let it cleanse my mind, I feel free now.
But the airways are clear and there's nobody singing to me now.

No change, I can change
I can change, I can change,
But I'm here in my mould.
I am here in my mould
And I'm a million different people
From one day to the next.
I can't change my mould
No, no, no, no, no...
I can't change...
I can't change...

Cos it's a bittersweet symphony, this life,
Try to make ends meet,
Try to find some money then you die,
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down,
You know the one that takes you to the places where all the things meet.

You know I can change, I can change,
I can change, I can change,
But I'm here in my mould.
I am here in my mould
And I'm a million different people
From one day to the next.
I can't change my mould
No, no, no, no, no...
I can't change my mould
no, no, no, no, no...
I can't change,
Can't change my body,
no, no, no...

I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down...
I'll take you down the only road I've ever been down...
Been down...
Ever been down...
Ever been down...
Ever been down...
Ever been down...
Have you ever been down?
Have you've ever been down?

Original text by RICHARD ASHCROFT
© La Pensine Mutine. All rights reserved. Reproduction prohibited.

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